Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Is Striving for Perfection a Flaw or Just Anal Retentive?

I'm anal.
There, I've admitted it, and so now moving on...

That admission is for my husband who never criticizes me for trying to make things perfect (in my eyes). It actually only becomes a problem when I stay up too late at nights scrubbing or tidying so that I don't have to look at the "mess" in the morning, which puts me off right away at 7:30 am. It becomes a problem when I agonize over unfinished business while laying in bed (insomniac), or while I'm driving on the highway (daydreamer).
It really becomes a problem when I fight with my annoyed husband, who is overloaded at work and trying not to be overwhelmed by little finishing touches on this reno during a day off...while his phone continually rings, btw!
Thankfully we move past things very fast and move on with the whole ordeal. Right hun?
So what am I anal about?
I can't stand trying to fix up mistakes made by past homeowners, which of course has happened in each and every house we've bought. In the process of nit-picking at every little detail I've lost sight of what the house looks like as a whole, overall, and am focusing instead on the little mistakes. Some we have managed to fix ourselves, and others the only solution is to completely overhaul the problem, which is something I neither want to do or spend the money on.
I've been known to stay up at nights until whatever I'm working on is perfect to me, be it touching up paint, or wiping down cupboards or walls. I never used to be like this: as I'm reading what I've wrote I realize I sound a bit obsessive/compulsive. Lord knows my family doesn't need another one of those, so I am sticking with anal retentive...don't judge me :).
When I sell this house I want it to look great inside and out, and I guess I'm anal about that too. I want prospective buyers to view this house and see the amazing things I saw in it when we bought it 4 years ago. So sometimes I walk through it and try to see the house through their eyes. But then my eyes are drawn towards irregularities that, while someone else probably won't notice, I can't stand. Thank goodness for Mr.Clean Erasers: they have been my lifesaver these last weeks with scuff marks and crayon (thank you children).
I feel accomplishment in what we've done to our home, but I suppose I wish we could do more. To do more would be a waste of time and money, and so now I'm ready to just let it go.
In the last 4 months this house has felt more like home to me than in the last 4 years. There is a peacefulness about it that settles around me and brings me comfort. I will miss that, and I hope that I can settle in to the new house just as easily.
I adore moving; I love packing, unpacking, cleaning up the old house for the new people and putting my stuff in it's new special place. I like the changes a move brings, the new feel of a new place, and the adventure of setting up a home. This may come from having moved around so much in my life: I lost count at 18 times. Once I'm settled in for a while, I get itchy feet and become vaguely bored with my surroundings, at which time I usually start to change something in the house or the yard. Once that has been exhausted, I feel the need to move. Hopefully this will slow down as I get older, or else I will turn all that energy into travelling...something that is sure to bring change and adventure! Then, when I return from some far off land (probably Turtle Lake), I will open my front door and be glad that I'm home.
the beginning of refinishing the stairs on Friday

halfway done

stairs finished Wednesday, minus the trim work.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Natasha I can totally understand and you already know what the problem is. When we renovate are own homes, we are up close We see all the little imperfections cause we have done the work. It drives you crazy and once you let it go a a few months have gone by you don't even notice it any more. I speak from experience and you hit it on the nail on the head.

    Love the pics and I look forward to reading your blog. Love you.